Hot hair!

This heat wave has made me to do something I’d rather not have done. I’ve been forced to ditch the wigs much sooner than I’d planned.

Even on the dullest of days when it’s cold outside they are annoying to wear. A wig is like a hat you aren’t able to take off. So this sweltering weather has made it unbearable. Please spare a thought for the far too warm wigged-up women. There are more of us than you realise.

I’ve already managed to cut down on my wig wearing. Candice and Raquel really don’t get out much this days. However I still wear a wig for work and important occasions. That was until last week. It was so hot that I couldn’t bear it any longer. It was making me feel ill so it had to come off.

It’s strange and scary to go without a wig in public. I’m used to having long hair but now it’s incredibly short. Sometimes I forget and have a shock when I look in the mirror. I no longer see the healthy person I used to be.

Considering everything I’ve been through I still find it hard to comprehend why it continues to matter quite so much. After all it’s only hair and I’m not bald anymore. The funny thing is that to the outside world I look well.

But my lack of hair reminds me of the deadly disease that’s in my body, currently, hopefully, still asleep. I didn’t suddenly decide to have a cropped cut. The cancer did that.

I’m trying to make the most of what I’ve got while I’ve still got it. I went to see my lovely hairdresser Angela and she managed to do something with the unruly regrowth. I now have an actual hairstyle and I like it a whole lot more. I’d say that anyone growing their hair back after chemo should get it properly cut sooner rather than later. It was amazing how much better it made me feel.

Even so, I’m not quite ready to put all my wigs away just yet. Besides today there’s going to be torrential rain and I’m going to need a hat…

No 5 on the List for Living

I’ve done two big things since I last updated my blog. I had that dentist appointment, the one I wasn’t sure if I’d make. Not only did I have the check-up but I didn’t need anything doing – yay!

It was a quite unusual feeling to be in a kinda medical setting with the white coats and the white walls and the smell of heavy duty cleaning products…. to be told that there’s nothing wrong.

It was a pain free celebration of still being here six months on. But still it was going to the dentists and it’s never that pleasant.

The other thing was a lot more relaxing…..

5) Recover from chemo on a ridiculously perfect beach

This must be the most chilled out way that I’ve ticked something off my List for Living!

Holidays are not just about going away; they’re also about having something lovely to look forward to. The thought that at some point my treatment would be over and that one day I’d be able to spend time at a brilliant beach and just gaze out to sea, helped to get me through the chemo.

I went to Cornwall with my friend Anna. This is one of my favourite places. The scenery was stunning and the beach wasn’t busy. We did a whole load of nothing. Perfect.

With the other things that I’ve done off my wish list there was a sense of – wow I can’t believe I’ve done that. This, however, was more a case of I needed that. It’s number 5 on my List for Living. That shows how important this was.

It’s now two months after my last evil chemo cocktail and I’m still so chronically tired. I don’t think I realised just what an ordeal I’ve been through. My body is still trying to make me understand. This is the most exhausted I’ve ever been over such a long period.

This break not only enabled me to get a bit better. You could also say it draws a line in the sand. The last horrendous six months are over. The holiday has allowed me to separate that time with now. Hopefully this half of the year will be about having a more normal life and enjoying a lot more views like this.