It’s my last chemo. In total this is number 78. What a terrifying achievement. It’s both ridiculous and amazing that I’ve had so many of the toxic cocktails. They’ve made me horrifically ill and but also they kept me alive.
It’s been around 14 years since I was first diagnosed but it’s been in the last four years that I’ve had most of the chemo.
As you know I travel a long distance by train from my home in the Cotswolds to London for treatment. I quite enjoy the journey. It’s also easier to be ill on a train than in someone else’s car! Looking out at the countryside also helps to put things into perspective.
The landscape looks so very beautiful. When you’re aware that your life maybe limited, things take on a new meaning. On these train journeys, when I look out the window, the colour of the land and the sky seem to be more vivid. Somehow much brighter. Like it’s being filtered though some kid of photo app. Or maybe I’m just noticing more especially after being cooped up at home most days. Whatever it is I’m glad that soon I won’t be having make this trip to get a big dose of toxic drugs.